Lead a vivid life that does good

Category: lead vividly (Page 5 of 18)

The hidden power of belief

believe_in_yourselfI was reading a study where people were given the opportunity to buy the exact same pain-killer, but packaged in different ways and costing different amounts of money. They then followed up to see which drugs worked more effectively, and discovered that the more expensive the drug, the better people ‘believed’ it worked.

Think about that. We buy a more expensive version of EXACTLY the same pain-killer, and because we believe it’s better … it is better!

Belief is probably one of the most powerful predictors of success I can think of.

Want to lose weight? If you believe you can do it and believe in a programme, you are half way there.

Want to become a more patient parent? You need to believe you can be more patient.

Want to change a habit? Belief is critical.

You can achieve things you never thought possible.

You just need to believe in yourself.

The issue with belief, is so many of us have stopped believing we can. Which means that we believe we CAN’T, and changing what we believe is incredibly hard. Our self-talk is incredibly powerful.

Often believing comes from small successes, so if you are struggling with belief start by setting a really small, short-term goal (maybe 3 weeks away) and work on it every day.

You will nail it.

I know you will, because I believe in you!

 

 

3 ways to stay focused on your goals

FocusA number of years ago Bill Gates’ mother held a dinner party and invited both Warren Buffet (super rich guy) and Bill along. At the dinner party she ask what they believed was the single most important factor for their success. Both Bill and Warren gave the same one-word answer: “Focus.”

Focus is one of those annoying words that continually collides with my life. Historically I would not regard myself as a particularly focused person, but slowly over the years I have been improving. As I have improved I have realised that FOCUS requires constant, well focus, on three areas:

1. Turning Goals into Priorities

In order to be focused you must know what you are focused on. The word after all means “the centre of interest or activity.” Without having goals, both in business and personally, you won’t have interests or activity to centre yourself on.

But just as important as having goals, is reviewing them very frequently and setting actions. For me this involves a weekly review of my goals and strategies to set the course for the week, then almost daily reviewing these and setting actions for my day ahead.

Simply said. To focus you must have goals and resolve to take action daily.

2. Be in the Right Space

Now that you have your priorities you need to have a work-space where you can actually get on and do the work without too much interruption. As your all know, not all work spaces are the same. Some of us have our own office and others work in open plan.

The key thing to remember is that different focus, requires different spaces. Sometimes I need to work in my office as I need the tools there to do the work. Other times I can sit with my laptop in a café. Other times I go on a walk with a piece of folded up paper and a pen (so I can leave my phone behind). Depending what you are focusing on determines the space you should be in.

Once in the right space and ready to focus, it’s important to eliminate as many distractions as possible. This mainly involves communicating with the team around you that you are focusing a major goal for a period of time.

3. De-clutter ALL Distractions

I was reading yesterday that the average Facebook user in New Zealand checks Facebook 14 times a day. Social media is great for connection with people, but for most of us it distracts us from their goals. Similarly in our work-spaces there are distractions everywhere, so it is little wonder we struggle to focus. As I’ve become more focused I have had to take some pretty radical steps and a few of these are below:

  • Implement GTD (Getting Things Done). It’s a book. Buy it. Implement it.
  • Have a tidy work-space and try to only have the work in front of you, that you are focusing on. This stops distractions.
  • Turn off every type of email notifications on every device. My focus doesn’t last long, the last thing I need when a new email arrives is an excuse for my brain to get distracted.
  • Turn off notifications on your phone. All of them at first, then bring the critical ones back in. Social Media are unlikely to be the ones you turn back on. While you are at it, delete the most distracting apps from your phone.
  • Relentlessly remove yourself from email lists. The goal of an email is to distract you and get you to check in on their website. Our goal is to not be distracted and to have as much focused time as possible.

Distraction is everywhere which makes focus incredibly hard. If focus is important, you need to radically reduce the distraction. You can still clear Facebook, or check out websites. Just not when they prompt you and not when you are focused.

Becoming more focused is a constant struggle for me. I get constantly distracted and interrupted and I take on too much. All distraction comes at the expense of the goals I think are really important for me.

That said, the more I focus, the more I appreciate the value of focus and the more determined I become on my quest for more.

I’d love to hear if you have tips for becoming more focused, so comment and let me know what you think.

Do you have a minute?

Havea minute?I hate running on a treadmill!

Nothing does my head in quite as much as watching minute after minute tick by, while I stay in one place and move exactly nowhere.

It’s funny how one minute can feel like a blink of an eye, but when things are moving slowly or you are watching a countdown each second feels slow and a minute takes forever.

1 minute in the scheme of our lives is not much time. Even in the fullness of a day, one minute only equates to 0.07% of your day. There are 1440 of them each day.

1 minute is nothing. Unless you make it something. A minute every day … can radically transform your life.

The thing about minutes is they build-up. If you were to do a new habit for just a minute a day, you would spend 6 hours on that habit over a year! All from just one minute.

Maybe its writing in a journal. Or meditation. Or prayer. Or exercise (yes 1 minute counts). Or Reading. Or playing with your kids. Or … ?

Do you have a minute?

Just one minute.

Everyday.

Maybe it could change your life!

The other thing about minutes as they seem to extend. Sometimes spending a minute on something daily, is just enough to get you started, and very soon you are spending 5 or 10 minutes a day.

Start small with just 1 minute.

Start today.

Repeat!

Be more trusted, by first trusting.

I remember sitting with a couple of young entrepreneurs a Trustfew years ago as they asked my opinion on their business idea. The weird thing about the conversation is they tried to tell me without actually disclosing what their idea was. They were concerned that I might steal their idea. After playing that dance I got pretty candid with them and told them I had enough business ideas of my own that I will never do, so I don’t really need their ideas.

Furthermore, I told them to go talk to some other people, who might just be interested in stealing their idea. People with deep pockets who could out execute them, but may just make great partners.

Over the years I have met more than my fair share of people who have the wrong default position when it comes to trust. They choose, sometimes because of past hurt, to never trust people until the person has earned their complete trust.

This is so sad and not for the reason that they may expect.

You see, trust works both ways. If you trust me … I trust you … then you trust me more.

If I start trusting you and sense that you don’t trust me, I assume you are untrustworthy. That you lack integrity.

Merely by not trusting others, you may be seen by everyone around you, as a person not to be trusted.

I know that trust is easier said than done…

You will get hurt.

You will have your trust abused.

At times it will cost you money.

And yet … we should trust anyway.

Do you have 406 things you could get rid of?

Floppy Disk 1993This is a picture of a floppy disk I own and have held onto since 1993. It’s a backup disk of the accounts from my one of my first businesses in 1990. I have no idea why I am holding onto it. Maybe it is part memento and part my own personal IT museum, as it certainly has no practical use.

The issue with this disk is that it is representative of a lot of things I have around the house and work that I don’t really need. Things I am holding “just in case”.

So at the beginning of February I decided to start a minimalist challenge. It basically goes like this.

1 Feb – Get rid of 1 thing
2 Feb – 2 things
3 Feb – 3 things

… all the way to …

28 Feb – Get rid of 28 things.

A total of 406 items I will either throw out, sell, or give away.

Now because I love freedom I have decided to bend the rules and basically just make sure that I get rid of 406 things by the end of Feb, and to date I have got rid of 160 items from either home or my office. And in addition each of my kids need to do 30 things and Karina needs to do 100.

600 items as a family sounds a lot, but it is surprising how much stuff we keep “just in case” I need it in the future. Once I started looking with a fresh set of eyes it was amazing what I saw.

Do you have 406 things you could get rid of? – You might be surprised.

Like a lot of things, it all comes down to the right question.

For example, in the wardrobe. Instead of asking “Is there any chance I will wear this in the future?”, which is our normal question.

I need to ask tougher questions;
“Do I wear this often?”
“Do I love it?”
“Do I look good in it?”

If the answer is no, it’s a real contender for the get rid of pile.

 

Leader vs Manager

Leader ManagerA fantastic quote from 2006 on the difference between a Leader and a Manager. I think I first read it on a cereal box.

The quote is still so relevant and a constant reminder for those of us on a quest to become better leaders (and sometimes even better managers)

Are you an Ideas Person?

Ideas PersonThe micro expressions on my face probably reacted negatively after hearing her proudly proclaim that “I’m an Ideas Person.” I’m not so much disagreeing that the person is an “ideas person”, rather I am reacting to the implicit meaning which is, “not everyone is an ideas person, and I am”.

Every person I have ever met has ideas.

Ideas come from what they know. Ideas are built on the things they are learning and the experiences they have had. I know a lot of people who don’t believe they are ideas people but they are. At some point they have said or thought things like;

  • This is stupid … we could …
  • If only I could … then …
  • I wonder if I did … if that would …

Now, some people are super smart and have more ideas than others and some ideas blow my mind (like the guys to decide to make 50 cent microscopes out of paper), however everyone is capable of new ideas.

The key of course is to be ever-increasing your experiences and knowledge.

If you are not learning, looking for new challenges, and seeking feedback. You will generate significantly fewer ideas.

When I struggle to have good ideas it is usually because I have no new input. I am not being adventurous, not reading, not watching videos or listening to new ideas. I am just existing. Without new input I’m not wiring my brain to think of new things.

New ideas it seems, lead to new ideas.

Should you choose Passion or Pay?

042313.passion_pay.web_I was wondering the other day how I would guide my kids if they ask me what is more important in a job, passion or pay?

Suppose they are passionate about an interest, but it really doesn’t pay that well, should they pursue the interest or get a good paying job?

When I talk of a good paying job I mean a job were you can provide well for you (and your family) without spiraling into consumer debt just to stay alive. And passion is probably best describe as something a purpose that brings joy to your heart, does good and makes you feel alive.

Obviously if you can have both you are incredibly fortunate, but in reality few people have both.

So which should it be?

Firstly seek both. Take a hit on a high paying job and take the job that you are passionate about. Just make sure you can live within your pay comfortably because nothing kills passion more quickly than money problems.

Secondly, if you must choose one or the other. Choose Pay, so long as the job doesn’t suck all the life out of you. Choose a good paying job that provides for your needs AND leaves you with time and energy to pursue your passion.

Keeping your head above water financially is important, but so is pursuing a passion. I know many people who have chosen huge money over passion and grumble about their work most times I see them. Their pay may be good, they may have everything they need, but that lack the joy that comes from chasing their passion.

Passion or Pay … which would you pick?

Are you going to change the world or not?

Be the change

Within most of us exists a longing to make a positive change in the world. We see news, meet people and experience things that make our stomachs churn to the point that we would love to make a difference.

We want to change the world, but instead we do nothing.

Why is that?

I wonder if it’s because we think the problem is too big and we have been taught to have an all or nothing approach. We are led to believe that in order to have an impact we need to change the whole world or fix the whole problem.

The truth is no one person can truly change the world and it’s unlikely you will either.

Maybe it’s time we stopped having “change the world” as our benchmark as it makes anything less feel small, insignificant and pointless.

THIS IS A LIE

You can make a difference in one person’s life.

You can radically change that person’s world.

You can. Yes you.

And you can do it today!

So the question is … Are we going to change the world or not?

One step that changed your life.

live-courageouslyYou are courageous.

Seldom have I seen or met a person with the courage and determination that you have.

The way that you replaced your old habit and made the positive change in your life is amazing. I wish I knew how you got it, but the resolve you have is inspirational and I love the humble joy you carry from succeeding.

When I speak to you I’m reminded that ‘a journey of a thousand miles begins with one step’ and that you just took one step after the next. As with any journey worth doing it has been hard. There have been times you have tripped and fallen, yet you just seem to get back up and keep going.

Now, you are so radically changed that people who meet the new you, cant fathom who you used to be.

Thank you for deciding to take the first step.

Your enthusiasm is contagious.

I cant wait to see what you will do next.

This post is written to YOU.

It’s to Thank You for who you have become a month, or a year, or a decade from today, as a result of the steps you are taking now.

You truly are courageous.

 

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