A friend of mine has just spent a couple of weeks there teaching to churches in China. He was telling me how he had dinner with his parents in Auckland, a day later he wakes up in a hotel in Shanghai, and just a day after that they are woken from their sleep in a small hut in the provinces and told the police are coming. Apparently the Chinese don't take to kindly to foreigners teaching stuff other than communism. He and his two friends are loaded onto the back of mopeds and whisked away up some back tracks to avoid detection and arrest.  There was a spark in his eye that I haven't seen in a while as he recounted how the ride on the moped was like an out of body experience, it seemed so surreal. The taste of his mums stew still lingered in his mouth and he could not believe that in less than two days he had gone from the comfort of home, to escaping the authorities in a foreign country.

There is something about my friend's heart that has grown warmer since he left. His Spirituality and personality have grown from the two weeks in China and I sense that the people he taught have benefited from what he did, even though he made little mention of it. He said he was going to do the same thing next year, so that he and his friends in China can grow.

As I think about the time my friend spent on people he didn't know at great risk to himself, my mind turned to my young friend who asked me the question the other day. A huge lesson for me over the last 10 years has been the value of time.

When I was younger I used to fill my time up with activities, good ones like friends, family and entertainment. I used to spend time doing things because I thought they were a good idea without really considering there implications or true value. I still do that by the way. When I was younger I was actually more time rich than I am now, no kids or added responsibility, but I didn't perceive it that way and spent heaps of time doing ridiculous things that really didn't matter in the long run.

I wonder if I had really thought about it 10 years ago if I would have spent more time helping more people, people I don't know like people in China or Costa Rica, or homeless people in town, or just helping out in places where I get no recognition (a hard thing for a young man to do). Not all of my time just more of it, rather than basically none of it.

I am still learning about time, the problem is I keep losing it while I learn…

My MP3 player was blasting music through earphones as I return to my cruise speed after slowing for Waharoa. The old Honda that I was bringing back from Tauranga doesn't have an AUX plug for these modern fan dangled devices. It doesn't have cruise control or nifty paddles on the steering wheel to change gears or a digital speedo. Lost after 3 years is the new car smell, it now has one of those car airfreshener smells . A smell that you know is hiding a potentially more potent odour, the way lighting a match in the toilet tries to hide a foul stench.

My foot moves slightly to adjust the manual cruise control and keep me at target speed when I hear over the music that my cellphone is ringing. A friend of mine has decided that I am sufficiently old and grey enough to ask about what I would do differently if I look back 10 – 15 years. He is really asking what would I do differently to become a better more balanced person, hmm. The first words out of my mouth were that I don't have regrets, just lessons, and that I would not be the person I am today if I hadn't done all the things I have done. It is probable I wouldn't be running Agoge, and I believe that our whole lives to date are preparation for this moment.

I have started to reflect on the question and will in time find some profound and deep words of encouragement, then wax lyrically about stories from my twenties. In the meantime I think everyone should go to Costa Rica. Now for those of you are ignorant and don't know much about this Central American country it has a population of 4.2 m (slightly bigger than NZ), 50,660 sq kilometres of land (20% the size of NZ), a GDP of $8949 (a 1/3 that of NZ) and the capital city is San Jose. They speak Spanish and 90% of the population is Roman Catholic.

All this new found awareness comes about because I was chatting to Jasmine yesterday and she said she would love to travel there. I nodded and smiled trying to look and act like a boss that had a clue. I was kind of sure Costa Rica was in Central America and I knew they spoke Spanish but that was it, save for the knowledge that Miss (Mrs) Costa Rica was accidentally given the crown for Miss World rather than the winner Miss Russia and I'm clueless why I would know that!

My face looked as blank as a clear screensaver, mind on nothing happening, so I did what I do best and asked another question. This morning I goggled Costa Rica. Maybe we should take a team of people from Agoge there? kind of like a school camp.

If I had my time again I might of travelled and sojourned more, but that would have been to the detriment of what I have already become. The new model cars are better than the old ones because the designers are looking for continual improvement. In the end we all need to understand that what we are now, is because of what the old models of us were, because of all the experiences we have had and all the choices we have made. If we continue to learn from the old model, the new model will be better.

I took my kids to town yesterday morning for quality time. Most of the conversation with Talia & Kyla was around the death of Beth a friend of ours from church who died of cancer on Saturday Morning. It seems like an odd conversation to have with your 4 & 6 year olds, but the purity and innocence of their questions is always so stimulating. Answering them in real and understandable ways stretches me, as so often there questions are not about how, or where, but why? Providence is not an answer that kids just accept. To be honest like my kids I struggle with the physical side of death. Not being able to spot that person in a crowd, or shake their hand or talk to them, and this is for people that I don't know intimately. I have yet to lose someone really close to me, and I can't imagine how Phil and his kids feel, not being able to hold or love Beth again.

Last night we decided to have takeaways in the car, down by the Waikato River. It is NZ's longest and only north flowing river. It flows at around 3 – 4 kph, which means you have to paddle faster and harder than 4 kph to go upstream. It was kind of a weird evening, dusk was hastened by the dark clouds that promised an imminent flow of millions of waterfalls from the sky. As we watched, a canoeist paddled swiftly down the river, he to would have known the rain was coming but I suspect he didn't care. I got to thinking that I have long thought about canoeing down the river. You will notice I said down, canoeing up would simply take all the fun out of it. I have not yet had that adventure and I determined to do that this summer.

As I contemplate yesterday, Beth, the kids, providence and the river I am reminded that life is created to be lived not just gotten through. Maybe we shouldn't always be paddling against the current; maybe we should relax more and enjoy the ride. It reminds me that life is more than making money and buying clothes and houses and yummy food, that it is about appreciating creation and adventure and most importantly people.

How many people just go through life, and don't live it. I too, often forget to live. My problems and issues become my focus and I just get through another week. I act as though life is some hard journey where I always have to paddle upstream and forget that my days are numbered and that in a generation or two my name will be consigned to a family tree somewhere.

I resolve for the ten thousandth time to live and to be!