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Treat others the way you want to be treated

The Golden Rule states “In everything, therefore, treat people the same way you want them to treat you.”

It doesn’t say when its convenient or when it suits. It doesn’t say to some of our friends or people we get on well with.

It says in everything.

All things.

All situations.

All people.

In everything…

On Facebook, by email, by txt, behind their back, and face to face.

Whether they live in our country or another, and believe what we believe or have faith in different things.

Friends, enemies and strangers.

Poor, rich and in between.

Regardless of how they have treated you. Treat them the way you would want them to treat you.

In everything…

If we would want to be helped in hard times, help people whenever you can.

If you want people to stop talking harshly to you, stop being harsh.

If you want to be encouraged, be an encourager.

If you want to be heard, listen.

In everything!

The golden rule requires personal choices by everyone, every time we interact with another human being. How much different would society be if we all chose to live this way?

Unspoken Expectations

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We all have expectations of the people around us. We have an expectation that our spouse will do certain things. We have expectations on our kids, our bosses, our staff and even expectations on people we barely know.

And when people don’t live up to our expectations we get annoyed, frustrated and even angry. This leads to a break down in the relationship.

A few years ago I was introduced to the term “Unspoken Expectations” and I realised that so often the expectations we have for people, we haven’t discussed with them.

Say I decided I would really like a quiet relaxing Saturday at home. Then my wife and kids bounce me around the city doing “unplanned” things (on their list of things). I can become annoyed. I don’t want to bounce around the city. I need to relax.

But if I never sat down and discussed my need to relax with my family how would they know? If I never listened to what they needed to do, how will I know if my desire to relax is achievable? How will we negotiate a middle ground BEFORE we set about our day.

Yet, over and over again, we fail in relationships to speak our expectations beforehand (arguing about them afterwards doesn’t count). I have learned firsthand over the years “unspoken expectations” are a significant cause of relationship breakdowns in families, workplaces, charities and friendships.

If you don’t communicate and agree the expectations, it is not the other persons problem…

It’s yours!

14 tips when applying for jobs from the business owner of a recruitment company


UPDATED: Feb 2019

While a lot of the below post still applies. Technology is changing how CVs and Data of Jobseekers is handled.

I’ve written an updated post »

10 great tips when applying for jobs online!

 


ORIGINAL POST: Jan 2012

Having just spent an hour or two looking over applications for an internal role at agoge, I am compelled to share some hints about applying for jobs. They are just my perspective, from a guy who has been on the receiving end of literally 1000’s of CV’s and covering letters.

CV’s

  1. I don’t read the whole CV. Not even close, I just skim read. If I’m really interested I might read more than 10%.
  2. As I skim read, I’m looking for fit into my business culture, as well as growth and learning and experience that could be portable into my business. You don’t have to have done the job, just show me you could do our job, in our context.
  3. Even though I don’t read your CV, bad speling and formatting jumps off the page.
  4. Most CV’s arrive electronically, make sure they are PDF that way your formatting looks the same to me, as it did when you sent it. PDF also saves me clicking 2 times to open your docx on my doc machine and I can read and highlight all over your PDF on my iPad.
  5. Computers have colour available. Yip, you can use graphics and colourful fonts and pictures to sell yourself. It might make me read more than 10%. It will definitely make you stand out from 99.99% of the other people. I’m serious in the latest 100+ CVs I’ve read, none have done a good job of that.

The cover letter

  1. Firstly all of our ads have a contact name. So “Dear Sir/Madam” is really not appropriate. I also doubt I will ever be a “Sir”.
  2. If we ask you to provide 2 great reasons why we should consider you. Then provide 2 great reasons, don’t just cut and paste your last letter.
  3. On that note, I frequently read other companies names instead of our company name in people’s letters. Oops … best you proof read it, or better still get someone else to proof read it.
  4. Make it obvious in the cover letter that you have checked out our website, or know about who we are. You can’t underestimate how excited we get about people who are excited about us.
  5. Your first two lines of any letter either scream “boring, stop reading me”, or grab our attention and draw us to read the rest of the letter. Make it the latter.

Other stuff

  1. I really like it when people take an interest in our jobs and our company before they apply. It stands out in their CV, their letter and gets my attention.
  2. Alexander Bell created these amazing things called Telephones. If we give you permission, pick up the phone and ask a couple of questions. You’re not likely to blow it, and I will remember your name. Therefore your CV moves up the pile because you showed initiative.
  3. I know a lot of companies will now only accept electronic CV’s. I don’t mind getting a physical colour, bound CV. Dress up, call in, ask for the person and just let them know you wanted to set a good impression and drop your CV in. It’s scary as anything, but this is about getting the job you want. This will move your CV up the pile.
  4. I really appreciate honesty. If you’re applying for a job that’s a stretch. Say so. We often keep hold of CVs we might be interested in later.

So these are my suggestions. Some people will pay a lot more attention to your CV, most I suspect don’t.

Listen to my ideas, or don’t. It’s up to you.

Unless of course you’re applying for a job with me.

One question with Sam

Caught up for coffee with Sam who has recently returned from Hawaii for his summer holiday.

So I asked him … “highlight?”

The people.

Definitely the people.

I just loved spending time with the people, getting to know new people and having the time to listen to their stories.

‘He tāngata, he tāngata, he tāngata!’ (It’s the people, the people, the people)

Sam did heaps of amazing other things like swimming with Manta Rays at night, but his highlight was people.

Sometimes in our busy and task based days we forget that life is about people.

He tāngata.

Life is an adventure, and adventure is defined by you.

Cape Reinga
The noise in the back seat calms as Cape Reinga draws near. The squabbling turns to conversation about the lighthouse … the ocean … and the sea. Adventure for our family waits.

Our family value of adventure has drawn us here. A desire to explore and learn and have fun (despite another full day in the car). This particular adventure is also number 2 on my 12list for 2012.

For us, adventure means exploring, its often unusual, typically fun and sometimes hazardous. It often requires courage. Kid sized courage. The kind of courage that pressures parents into new things, because “we value adventure”.

Adventure creates learning.

Conversation.

Memories.

 

So go ahead and define your own adventure. Just don’t miss the opportunity to embark on an adventure of your own. Take your family, your friends, or yourself.

Go on be ADVENTUROUS!

 

Twelve : 12 memorable things for the 12 months of the year 12.

Twelve - Project Leap begins. A photo each day from 1 Jan 12 to 31 Dec 12. 366 photos in total, including the leap day | 1/366

Happy New Year and welcome to the year of 12.

Because it’s the year 12, and because there are 12 months in the year, why not have a 12 list?

A 12 list is kind of like a bucket list but easier, and just for the year. I think the idea beats new years resolutions (although Jim’s new years resolution is good).

A 12 list is a list of simple memorable things you want to do this year. Don’t worry about the order, or when you will do them. Just list 12 things, anything, as they come to mind.

Then pick one a month and do it, don’t forget to take your camera to record the memory.

Here is my 12 list:

  1. Have a snow fight with my family
  2. Visit Cape Reinga
  3. Marvel at a sunrise
  4. Catch a fish with Jayden
  5. Take my wife on a picnic (without kids)
  6. Fly again
  7. Have someone I have yet to meet, over for dinner
  8. Visit a good.water project
  9. Catch up with a person I didn’t see last year
  10. Go caving
  11. Have a bbq at the beach
  12. Take my kids to a NZ city they haven’t been to before

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‘Twelve’ – Project Leap begins. A photo each day from 1 Jan 12 to 31 Dec 12. 366 photos in total, including the leap day | 1/366

 

 

Marketing Spin from Hamilton City Council and Telecom.

Flying Solo 07
Telecom recently sent me a letter. It tells me how good they are for doubling my broadband usage from 20GB to 40GB. They are also putting the price up by $5. Thanks Telecom, you are really nice guys, except for the fact we don’t use 20GB and there is a new plan for 20GB that is $10 less per month.

I feel cheated.

Hamilton City Council sent me a letter telling me the valuation they use for rates are changing. They show me my rates now, and then show me my new rates, with water and rubbish separated. At first glance it looks like a saving, until I read the fine print of the existing rates. They include water and rubbish, so when I add the three up I am worse off.

I feel deceived.

My issue is not so much with the changes, but more importantly it’s with the way it’s communicated.  Why the ‘spin’? Why try to deceive us? Why not be honest?

Telecom really aren’t increasing my broadband because I need it, they are doing it to generate extra revenue. HCC are just playing politics.

Neither wants a relationship with me and therefore I don’t deserve authenticity. If they upset a few people along the way. They don’t care.

A small business like mine can’t behave this way of course. We would lose our customers, and our customers pay our wages.

But, it is a reminder nonetheless to make sure all of our marketing is authentic, and honest, and ultimately treats people, the way we want to be treated.

Lessons from Sixth Grade Soccer

Soccer
The opposition player intercepts the ball and launches through the gap towards our goal. Screens of “get back there” are heard from the side line as one of our team sprints his little heart out to try and be between the ball and the goal.

His opponent strikes the ball hard, it ricochets off the post, bounces off our player, and scores an own goal.

One of our team steps up and calls his team made an “idiot” for scoring an own goal and I intercede and explain that he had run hard and it was unlucky.

Later I thought about the parallels to other teams.

I thought about how sometimes we can do all the right things, but just be unlucky.

I thought about how often we can get down on someone for a mistake, when it was unintentional and they are just trying their hardest to win.

I thought about how often the people who complain the most, are the ones who left their team member to do it alone. Had they helped the outcome could have been all together different.

I thought about how sixth grade soccer is radically different to competition in the real world. And yet soccer, along with other sports, is where most of us learnt to be in teams.

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Throw out the Alarm Clock and grab an Opportunity Clock

Clock
In bed, out to the world, in a state of near comatose when suddenly that repulsive noise breaks the silence. The canned music or loud buzzing interrupts our dream, sleep is over, and we are called back to the land of the awake.

The work of the alarm clock is done for another day.

So why is it called an ‘alarm’ clock?

Is a new day really meant to strike such terror into our life that it is cause for ‘alarm’? Are our dreams so good that we need ‘alarm’ to bring us back to reality? Lets change the name of our alarm clock.

Lets call it an OPPORTUNITY clock.

When it awakes us from our slumber, it wakes us to new opportunities.

Opportunities to live. To taste. Listen. Touch. Smell. See.

Opportunities to create new things. To learn new things.  To experience new things.

Opportunities to experience laughter and sadness, fun and pain.

Opportunities to know and be known. To love and be loved. To seek God and experience freedom.

Everyday I have a choice. Start with an ‘alarm’ clock. Or awake to an ‘opportunity’ clock.

 

nb: I didn't create the term Opportunity Clock, just heard it and build on it.

And you prepare for the worst. And hope for the best.

Airbus A380new
Far above the ocean, an engine bigger than a large car suddenly disintegrates blasting shrapnel and metal in all directions. The shrapnel punches holes in the world’s largest passenger jet's wing, damages flaps, causes fuel to spew from the plane and degrades 2 of the remaining 3 engines.

In quick succession an unprecedented 54 alarms appear in the cockpit of the Qantas A380 on route from Singapore to Sydney.

In an interview on 60 minutes Captain Richard Champion de Crespigny describes the situation and some of his key decisions. Part way through the interview he states, "I thought lets protect this aircraft at the most basic level possible. And that was to position it within gliding range of Singapore. And that’s what we did."

"That’s a big call, gliding an A380", states the interviewer.

I love the captain’s reply. It is simple, striking and relevant to many situations.

"And you prepare for the worst. And hope for the best."

“Prepare for the worst” means I’m not ignoring the gravity of the event I am in. I’m not hoping its something smaller than it is. Preparing for the worst means I am recognizing it for what it is. Preparing for the worst means I am doing everything I can to position myself in a place where I have the best possible chance of recovering.

Prepare means more than just hope. It means action.

“Hope for the best”. Hope is critical, without hope all is lost. Hope enables you to make decisions, to think through events, to believe in yourself and the people around you. Hope, I believe, changes your mental direction.

Preparing for the worst in a bad marriage means admitting it is disintegrating and taking steps to fix it. Then hoping for the best.

Preparing for the worst in business means confronting the brutal reality of the situation and takings steps to recover it. Then allow hope to drive you.

Prepare for the worst in health, with the kids, at your job, in your illness and in relationships. Take steps to recover them. With hope!

Prepare for the worst, hope for the best.

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